An elementary school teacher (elementary school) in one of the provinces in Sumatra Island was completed the master of education in UNJ (State University of Jakarta). This mother when viewed from the old face about thirty-five years and over. He was blessed with two sons, the first 13-year-old and a small medium school in primary school. Each of these is the result of her marriage to a man whose education far below.
Julio, was the name of her first child. Was bursting with happiness. The hopes and dreams of nature permeated his thoughts. Is an ordinary, every parent has hopes and dreams that his son would be better than he, if possible, precisely to be the most perfect human being on this earth. Slowly but surely, the hopes and dreams that probe more deeply into the heart which then prompted him to arrange the various procedures and instructions which he will deliver hope and that her mind to the throne of dreams.
Over time, procedures and instructions that were applied in the life of Julio. One, two, three ... ... Julio years living under the operational direction and control of perfection. A set of rewards and punishment had always been strict in guarding every breath that continues the journey up and down across the spread of a mirage of life.
The high temperature hot stinging procedures and instructions to squeeze the liquid- bone marrow and hope it dives and fancies his mother had been drowned herself into the dark river bottom thick with mud, black mud.
Because energy has been depleted, Julio was hard to just lift her eyes. Julio did not know where he is now. He's trying hard pressed thick turbid water that has been contaminated due to black mud, only to find a narrow hole that hope can find points of light, a oxygen, and a drop of pure water.
He did not give an inch. Any attempt to do to be struggling and had tears in his eyes. However, he was increasingly helpless. At that moment, the mother screamed and tears flooded her cheeks red altar began wrinkled with age.
Slowly but surely, hope, and her mind crept up to the nature of consciousness. Procedures and instructions for Julio's body was wrapped so stretched breeze can enter the skin rubbed smooth. So was his bodyguard, reward and punishment has been dismissal. Now, Julio was learning to crawl in order to stand upright on its feet and became a man who he is he's a typical and unique.
Every child has unique characteristics and each of which was then differentiate with other children. Particularity and uniqueness that is in a child is a status that would clarify her identity. Julio and his mother, both in nasab (lineage) status is a child and mother. Indeed, in her blood Julio who was meant to flow also various potential possessed by the mother. However, apart from that there is potential flow of heredity the father. We all do not know the potential of the flow which has the strongest power in Julio. Possibly, the two potentials collaborate or even the potential that grandparents when he was in his mother and father not too dominant, but when he was in precisely Julio has a strong power.
We can not deny that the name was the desire of nature will bring animalistic impulses and who demanded satisfaction chaos (Chaplin, 2002). If the desire is not met there will be tensions. Therefore he will be very pleased and relieved if what they want fulfilled. Except for the fulfillment of that desire he often obscures the reality. He does not care whether his desire is realistic or not (Hall, 2000).
In the above illustration evident, that the mother wants to make Julio grow and develop into a perfect human being. To pave the mother's wishes and then make various procedures and instructions in a perception would lead to human Julio want. According to information presented by Julio himself to me, gives a chance of his life he has so. When to sleep, wake up, eat, study, bath, play, and everything associated with him was scheduled neatly. Such conditions, apparently has been going on since she was little until the foot junior high school. Every day she had to tutor this subject, that, and so on in a strict supervision.
I sure hope and desire of the mother is very noble. Where parents do not want to see his son succeed? Is a hypocrite if you say no to. Because by having a successful child, parents will receive an award from the society that he who has succeeded in educating her child properly, the more respected, listened to his words and his orders obeyed by others. Conversely, if parents have a child who fails then he will be tried and convicted by the public as a person who failed in educating children. So does her mother Julio. Mission and vision is already fine, it's just that he did not consider the real conditions that are provided Julio with the principle of individual differences.
As long as I know, Julio is a child who has a good potential in areas other than academic. So far, he's an academic value is less satisfying that there are some teachers who then motivated by the lack of proper ways, although the result is nil. However, at a stage show I was so enjoying the arts and the role he acts on stage. Before that, I also made touched by the attitude and behavior. When I was washing the toilet alone, he rushed offered to help me but so far he has given attributes by his friends as a lazy child. This means, he has some other potential that will make her legs straight up.
Another potential of this is that less attention and consideration from the mother in preparing and implementing procedures and instructions. Her mother was of the view that all children have the same potential. It is this view which Freud later called the predicate thinking, or thinking that will result in a chaotic way of thinking (Hall, 2002). Therefore, procedures and instructions are applied instead of realizing the desire and hope, but precisely backfired for him and Julio.
For the mother, if the procedures and instructions to be maintained and he will be a lot of people fantasize. In fact maybe he will do everything they can to make it happen, even with ignoring ethics. For example, with coercion, violence, intimidation, aggressive, and so forth.
On this, Julio also said that he was treated that way. The mother also later admitted it to me. Julio was forced to follow and comply with procedures and instructions that even though he could not reach them. Because of her mother's treatment for quite some time and felt very hurt by Julio then travels over time Julio grow and develop into a child's rebellious, lazy learning, and wants his own. So that the potential itself can not be developed and actualized properly. When I asked, attitudes and behavior that simply was in the effort to avoid the pain.
Childhood experience that was very impression on Julio and have a significant effect on her life next. This was obvious when the last time we met. Although he has been separated remains far and rarely met with his mother, but the attitude and behavior has not changed significantly. In some ways it has changed.
Alhamdulillah after a couple of times to meet, discuss, and coordinate with his mother, now she has realized, understood, and accept what it is with Julio without any condition and willing to improve its strategy. Similarly, with Julio, he seemed to have no antipathy longer with the mother and are ready for change.
Without conscious phenomenon Julio and his mother had given a lot of very important lessons to me as a preparation for my life ahead. There are several points which I think is important from the incident, among others:
1. Child is unique and special, meaning that every child has different potential to each other.
2. Forcing children to be someone else is a criminal offense.
3. Accept what the child is a form of respect for the child.
4. One hopes and desires should be adjusted and communicated with the reality and ethical norms.
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